One Day… and Counting

Just a place to record the life and times of me!

I am heartbroken….

Today was the day….we said goodbye to our fur baby….

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We love you Honey de dog…. You truly were, are, and forever will be the sweetest dog ever. Rest easy girl….

One day and counting….the tears falling down my cheeks.

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Grateful for another day…

I have anxiety…. Medical anxiety to be exact. I worry incessantly about getting some horrible disease and dying. I am getting to the age where people I know and love are getting sick and not recovering….moving on to the next life. I’m not going to debate religion with anyone. I have my own views that are centered on the existence of a Heavenly Father, His Son, Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost…I also believe that there is a much better life after this one….and  still, I worry about my health to the point that I actually do make myself sick. Every tiny pain I feel morphs into some incurable disease that will end my life before I am “ready” to go. Is anybody ever really ready??? I can’t answer that. I just know that I need to get my situation figured out because I really don’t want to quit living my life, whatever time I have left, because I am afraid of dying.

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I took this picture when I was struggling to leave the comfort of my bed this morning. I love sleep…it truly is the only time I feel peace…anyways…my first thought this morning was “Welcome to another day. Find happiness and make it a good one.” So that is what I have tried to do. The anxiety still creeps in and I still have had my bouts of fighting worry, but I keep plodding away. I think this is going to be a long haul but I am hopeful that I will get it sorted long before I finished with this life.

By the way…we have made the “tough” decision concerning our sweet dog.

One day and counting… The moments I actually find peace.

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Small thing…BIG memory!

I am in the process of remodeling a spare bedroom to be a more functional space. My goal is to have a working craft room that can quickly be shuffled into a bedroom when guests arrive. As I was painting today, I looked down and saw this….

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If you look in the middle area of the picture, you will see a small yellow pellet. This pellet is a remnant from one of the best evenings I have ever spent with my two kids. With out going into all the details let’s just leave it at….we had the biggest air soft gun war ever! We laughed, screamed, locked the doors, barricaded the house and even broke a window. That wonderful evening happened a long time ago….but every once in a while I come across one of these little yellow pieces of plastic and I am taken right back to that night. Memories are a powerful thing and I am so grateful that I have this one…

One day and counting…. Great memories with my kids!

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A day in my life….Honey de dog…

One thing I thought I might try this year is to document my life through pictures. I have a couple of friends who did this last year and shared their pictures on Facebook. It was fun to see how they approached taking pictures to meet daily prompts… I even tried it for a few days but lost interest, though I am not sure why. It really is pretty cool. 
There are so many pictures I could start with as I am still deeply involved in the whole “goal to live simply” thing…  And I am knee-deep in the process of remodeling my house so the attempt will be made to share that experience as well… Every day is committed to address one of those two areas of my life in some way, no matter how small and I am sure there will be lots of pictures to that end, (you should see my new bathroom!!!) but for today, I want to share a picture of our dog Honey.

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Honey was diagnosed with cancer almost two years ago and I fear that her days with our family are dwindling. She is a sweet, gentle friend that has brought much joy to our home. She is not a “complainer” but we are starting to notice just how weary she is when we look into her eyes. I struggle with the fact that we are probably facing a really tough decision in the very near future and really, we just want to do right by this pup. Honey spends most of her time sleeping in the spare room, but every so often, she musters up the strength and energy to come check in with her favorite human, my husband. They have such a strong bond and this reality has been particularly difficult for him. A few strokes on the head and some ear rubs are enough to convey the love that she needs to give, and to feel. She sighs deeply and wanders off to go back to sleep. I will miss her….

One day and counting….until the day we will have to say goodbye.

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Got Your Brights On??

At this moment in time, this is the view from where I am sitting…

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My hubby and I are currently headed to the Eastern Slope of Colorado for some much needed rest and relaxation… As well as some time together.

I am not entirely sure how much rest and relaxation we are going to get because the truth of the matter is, the weekend is jam-packed with stuff to do. Ice fishing,  watching two of my most favorite little girls in the world, 5k race… Busy time….

Anyways… back to the picture. My husband asked the random question “Got your brights on?” to another driver on the road. There was a hint of sarcasm in his voice because it was obvious that he did because the lights were blinding him. Despite his frustration, the question made me pause and ask myself “Got your brights on?” Hmmmm…. Do I?
Do I project a positive attitude towards others despite my own frustrations with the world?
Do I look for the good in people despite their “rough” exterior?
Do I help others grow in some way? Physically, spiritually, emotionally??
Do I pause in my day to reflect on the good that is all around me?
Do I tell people how grateful I am for them?
Do I say I am sorry?
Do I reach out and give a helping hand?
Something to think about for sure as I continue this journey through life.

One day and counting… The bright lights coming at me!

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The Goal to Live Simply…. and a brand new year!

I have often wondered if I should change the name of this blog to “The Goal to Simply”….it seems to fit the primary focus of my life. However, as I thought about, I decided that my life and all the goals that go with it are something that occur over time….measured by seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months….and yes, even years.
Time is a funny thing. I remember, when I was a much younger version of me, how time seemed to drag on forever! I could wait to turn 12, then 16, 18, 21….what was I thinking? Adulthood – it is TOTALLY a trap from which there is no escape!
I have been 48 for about two weeks now and my perspective on time is dramatically different than it used to be. In fact, my sister and I had a conversation earlier today that centered on how fast time seems to move with each passing year. Why is that?? I am almost positive that I am not the only one who is wondering what happened to 2014….
2015 has come too quickly….a lot is going to change in my little corner of the world. The daughter will be leaving home, the son is contemplating a family of his own and the hubby and I are going to embark on some major overhauling of the little place we like to call home. I am am excited for parts of the new year and for others well, not so much. I guess the trick is to make to most of each day and the time you have…. A reminder I have written on my bathroom mirror….(sorry about the arm)

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So there it is…. My goal to live simply starts each and every day….and hopefully before I go to sleep each night I can say “I found happiness today!”

One Day and Counting…..those passing  moments that one can never get back!
2015 is gonna be awesome!!

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What the heck happened????

Yesterday was May 25, 2014… wasn’t it??? Somehow I have “lost” the last 3 months of my life!! Crazy!

Quick recap is in order I guess….

June… did some professional development for two weeks. Ran a 200 mile relay… ever heard of a Ragnar? Yep, I am addicted! If you don’t know what one is, check it out… I have been told that I am either crazy or stupid. I tell people they don’t know what they are missing. Had a major meltdown in my world… was convinced that I was going to die… literally. After a whole host of things I would rather not go into here, let’s just say that I am NOT dying… medication is my friend, and acupuncture is not as scary as I once thought it was.

July… panicked because I realized that school (for me) started on July 23. This was actually no surprise, but for some reason I did not realize just how short my summer was this year. YUCK!

August… Students started school on August 4… (see why I panicked!) Ran ANOTHER Ragnar… seriously… you need to check it out!

Today… life is starting to turn the corner. I say that with a “knock on wood” because it seems like every time I think it is shifting in to a positive place… something slams me back to reality. I am not a pessimist by any stretch of the imagination, but, I have been through this enough to know…

My goal to live simply is alive and well… I take one box of whatever out the door at least twice a week. If I had my way, I would take everything out of my house TODAY, take it to the studs and sub-flooring, and start completely over. I know it is a work in progress, but I get impatient. I will start posting pictures of some of the things I have accomplished despite my really short summer… look for that soon…

One Day and Counting… til my house is my own again!!! (its a really long story)

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The Maiden Voyage

We did it!!! After almost four years, we FINALLY put our canoe on the water for the maiden voyage! Soooo exciting. Here’s some pictures to mark the event:

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Loaded on the trailer….

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Packing to the lake….

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Getting ready to put in….

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YES!! What an AMAZING experience!

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The end….. mud in the bottom to prove it!
So now we are looking forward to many more canoe adventures….
One Day and Counting….til the next canoe trip.

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Wasteful…

adjective

1. given to or characterized by useless consumption or expenditure: wasteful methods; a wasteful way of life.
 
Today I will rant!
I work in a public middle school and each Monday morning I start my work with cafeteria duty. The reason I have cafeteria duty is because we offer breakfast to all of students.. regardless of ability to pay. When students go through the breakfast line, they are each required to take 3 items. Today, breakfast consisted of either breakfast pizza or cereal, an orange and milk. As always, students took the required 3 items and proceeded to use the oranges for basketball skills practice… meaning they were throwing them away. Now, I am not going to say that this have NEVER happened before, but for some reason, today, I snapped. I am truly sick of watching perfectly good fruit being thrown away, I went in to the kitchen and got a box to collect all of these unwanted oranges in an effort to “save a little bit of money” for our school. I spent my entire duty collecting oranges to be served again at lunch. This next part is what really made me sick to my stomach… the kitchen manager informed me that, while my efforts were appreciated, all of the fruit would be thrown in the trash anyways. WHAT????? Ya’ll, I am not talking two or three oranges here.. I am talking about an ENTIRE fruit box full of oranges!! I am guessing the cost of this fruit to be around $50… and that is just the fruit I “saved” from the trash! The sad and tragic thing is that, in talking with the kitchen manager, I found that this happens at every meal they serve!!! Twice a day… five days a week… for the ENTIRE school year!!! You do the math on this one! And this is just the school I work in!!! I couldn’t stand the thought of so much waste so I asked if I could take the box of fruit home with me… the answer was NO! WHAT???? My family would be thrilled with a box of oranges… or, I could take them to the local food bank!! Trust me when I say that I witness lots of waste as part of my job, but this idea has sent me over the edge!!
 
I dont have the answer to this problem… it is far greater than I am but I want to figure out a way to make it change! Rules are made at the state and federal level that have to be adhered to… but to teach a child that it is ok to take something that you don’t pay for just to throw it away is completely wrong! Especially food that can be utilized by someone who would truly appreciate it!
 
Ok… that’s my rant….
My goal is still live simply and that includes all aspects of my life… each day is one day closer to that goal…
 
One Day and Counting… til the end of the school year! (2 days after this one)
🙂
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Patience… and the goal to live simply

I have been feeling a bit “blues-y” today and I am not entirely sure why. Well, actually I know why, but it isn’t something I really want to air out on the internet so suffice it to say that I am being impatient.

I have had some pretty big obstacles placed before me over the last couple of years and after a while, stuff like that tends to wear you out physically and emotionally. I am starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel with some of the challenges that I have faced, but it seems like when one thing looks like it is going to be resolved, another challenge quickly slides in to fill that void. I could give you multiple examples of how that has happened in my life recently, but I don’t like having such a negative perspective on life so I am  trying to find a way to focus on the positive. Let me tell you, some days are far easier than others.

I was just killing time on Pinterest…being more than a little grouchy because I can’t go on a vacation, I can’t buy a new car, I can’t remodel the bathroom or replace the flooring (both of which really need to be done) and happened across the following quote…

“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.”

I really needed to see that today. I have also been put in  my place. Instead of dwelling on what I can’t do, I really do need to focus on what I can do. I can continue to simply my life, I can continue to do my best in whatever I choose to pursue, I can find the good in things, I can continue to work on my afghan…(it is coming along nicely) and I can continue to dream. My husband and I have some great dreams and that is one thing I really love doing with him. The biggest thing that I know I can do is to practice being patient. Life really isn’t about having the most stuff… or the newest name-brand…. life is about taking time to actually live….

One Day and Counting… ways I can practice patience. (I am not going to lie.. this will be a challenge!)

 

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